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Monday, January 15, 2018

Seven Weeks Before Surgery

Seven weeks from tomorrow I will enter the hospital for the surgery that will radically transform my life. As that day draws nearer, people often ask me how I’m feeling. I answer that I am filled with anticipation, but also with nervousness. I don’t know how to explain to someone who is not transgender what it feels like to anticipate waking up for the first time in one’s life with a body that matches who one is. I am so eager to look in the mirror and not feel shame at the body I see. I hope for a day when I will meet a special someone and be totally comfortable with her physically. Right now I would struggle to do that. The body I live in daily is a foreign object to me. I am largely content with the rest of my appearance. But the discrepancy between who I am and the anatomical parts I received at birth is a constant reminder that I’m not whole yet. In a few short weeks that will change. That excites me.

However, the impending surgery awakens anxiety as well. This will be a huge transformation, physically and emotionally. This is not a simple procedure. The recovery process scares me. I don’t expect it to be easy. I don’t enter this with rose-colored glasses, thinking it’s all going to be champagne and roses. It’s going to be difficult, painful and ugly at times. It’s going to require all my inner strength to get through, along with a significant amount of strength from my friends.

Those friends have alleviated my deepest fear: that I would go through this process alone. Nothing has scared me more from the moment I began thinking about this than the prospect of facing it alone. A couple times I have doubted that the support I desire would be there. But you, my friends, have proven me wrong time and again. Just this week I learned that I would need to remain in Scottsdale two days longer than I had originally thought – leaving me with a gap in my support. Yesterday I asked a friend if she would come and be with me. Her immediate and unhesitant affirmation testified to her care and reminded me of the amazing friends I am blessed with. Knowing that I have a group of friends by my side through this process gives me tremendous peace. They know that I will be heavily dependent on them, and they have gladly committed to be there. How can I adequately express my appreciation? I trust that other friends will come visit me, in the hospital, in the days afterwards when I’m convalescing, and when I return home and will benefit from continued support. I am a fortunate woman.

I am not yet where I hoped to be financially. My first significant payment looms next week, followed a short two weeks later by the second payment. I’m going forward in full confidence that this will happen, one way or another. When I look at the generosity of my friends and larger community already, I am humbled and grateful. I appreciate so deeply all who have contributed, who are helping me achieve a dream that I never imagined would be possible. It’s not far now.
I’ll continue to check in as surgery day draws near, and look forward to sharing with you post-op as well.

If you can help me reach my financial goal, you can do so through the link below, or contact me directly if you’d prefer another means.



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